It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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