you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
Randomize