Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
