i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
Randomize