As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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