tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
