"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
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