her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Randomize
