Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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