If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
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