i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
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