By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
