You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Randomize
