I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
