Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
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