I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
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