hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Randomize
