What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize