alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize
