The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
