STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
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Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
These 17 Delivery Dudes Suck At Their Jobs But Are Winning At Life
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap