she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
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Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
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I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
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