I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Randomize
