They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
Randomize
