break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
I'm going to jail i love you
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
