just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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