Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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