Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
