And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
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