Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
