whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
Randomize
