was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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