Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
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