Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
he high fived his dick after we had sex
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
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