i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize
