I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Randomize
