Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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