Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
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