Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
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