Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
