69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
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