Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
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