I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Randomize
