We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
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