I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
