So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
I believe in your delicious
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Randomize
