The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
23 Bosses Confess The Craziest Thing They’ve Seen An Employee Do
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
19 People Confess What It’s Like To Have Sex With Someone That Is Transitioning
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal