I'm going to rape someone's good day.
I look better un-naked...
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
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