covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
Couch. On fire.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
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