So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
