Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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