Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
